Morpheus on… Remember, Remember…

…The Fifth Of November. Except you appear to have FORGOTTEN it, Britain. Guy Fawkes Night? No?

Sadly, since you went all American, you have REPLACED this venerable celebration with Halloween (a festival YOU originally invented). This is where kids go knocking on strangers’ doors… …have you really thought that one THROUGH?

Of course, your GOVERNMENT is DELIGHTED you have stopped celebrating an event which applauds a terrorist’s attempt to blow up their Parliament (where is Guy Fawkes now – when you NEED him?)

But it is sad to see you playing their game…

Footnote: as you are passing this way anyhow, please check out the COMMENTS on this piece – they’re WAY better than the original piece itself!


4 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by Alfie on November 5, 2010 at 5:39 pm

    I, at least, DO NOT play their game!

    A friend of mine changed his Facebook status to “Trick or treat?” last weekend and I responded with:

    “Sorry. I’m too old to understand what that means! Now bugger off and stop ringing my bloody doorbell!”

    In fact, my tactic of parking the cars close together and at odd angles on the drive, plus turning off all exterior lights worked perfectly this year. Our street lights are cleverly positioned so that they only light up my BACK garden (when I’m trying to do Astronomy dammit) not the front, so no-one attempted to fight their way through a pitch-black obstacle course to my front door!

    I think the celebration of 5th Nov. was originally to commemorate the FAILURE of the Gunpowder Plot but since our modern politicos came down with a bad case of “You elected us therefore we must know best about how you should live your life – so do as you’re told!” it is VERY tempting to look at it the other way!

    Resistance IS growing and there WILL be a new people’s revolution soon. Yes, even here in the stodgy old UK! I feel the disturbances in the Force!


    PS. I do believe I’ve done a comment longer than your original! Wow!

  2. Posted by Morpheus on November 6, 2010 at 8:23 am

    (This could be longer still!) You raise an interesting point. In our day (there’s a horrible expression) we thought little of what the celebration meant – we were too busy tying (which ought to be spelled “tieing”) bangers to rockets to use them as ground-to-ground missiles. Or launching military-style assaults on the Rushmere Golf-House. Or putting 50-50 mixes of caster sugar and NaCl (I can say that, since you can’t GET NaCl any more) into pipes to blow shit up.

    However – if one thinks it through – WAS the festival meant to celebrate the FOILING of the Gunpowder Plot (which was what WE were told) – or the initiative and righteous intent displayed by the Plotters? I suppose given an effigy of the main Plotter is traditionally BURNED on a pyre, it MUST be the former. But it is at best ambiguous. I (particularly given Pinky and Perky are currently trying to rip me off for five grand) would certainly favour the LATTER.

    Of course, all politicians would be better being blown up. Earlier, on Jon Stewart’s Daily Show, I was watching a speech given by O’Bama. In it, he stated that America MUST give priority to becoming independent of “foreign” oil imports. Good idea. Then Jon showed George Wan… sorry, WaLker Bush saying exactly the same thing, during HIS reign. Then Bill Clinton, during his. Then George Bush Snr. Then Reagan. Carter. Ford. And finally NIXON.

    THEN he showed Nixon – a FAR-RIGHT President – announcing that America needed a comprehensive socialised health-care plan. Which, nearly forty years later, O’Bama (barely) pushed through, while being labled a COMMUNIST! Politicians – HAH! Remember, remember… ALL of them!!!

  3. Posted by Alfie on November 7, 2010 at 5:35 am

    You are going to have to forgive me in advance for being a total swot here but my distant memories of Chemistry under Messrs Davies, Webb and Moore lead me to believe you MAY be referring to NaClO3 as the stuff that’s no longer available.

    I do, in fact have quite a bit of NaCl in the house for putting on my chips and a big bag of it in the garage for clearing ice off the drive in winter!

    So that’s ChlorATE not ChlorIDE.

    And note that I carefully said “off” and not “off of” which would, regretably, be seen as correct by some in “these days”!


  4. Posted by Morpheus on November 7, 2010 at 3:21 pm

    Damn damn DAMN you’re right! Even as I TYPED the thing, a little voice was telling me, “You’ve got it WRONG again, Vincent!” Perhaps it was the ghost of Bunter…

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