Let’s start the year (and decade) with something TRULY absurd.
ALLEGEDLY, while a 27-year-old woman (let’s call her April – since it’s her name) was visiting Disney’s Epcot, a guy in a Donald Duck outfit fondled her boob and said something lewd.
Now of course, a reasonable response would have been to have kicked Don in the nuts (which would have been easy, since he doesn’t wear trousers) – or to simply have complained to security – in which case the “cast member” (which Disney call their theme-park characters) would probably have gotten canned and ended up as a football mascot – or Ronald McDonald.
But NO. She is SUEING the Disney Company (whose equity and assets currently total nearly a hundred BILLION US dollars) claiming that – two-and-half-years on – she still suffers from… wait for it… “post-traumatic stress”, “flashbacks”, “cold sweats”, “acute anxiety”, “insomnia”, “muscle-contraction headaches”, “nausia”, “nightmares”, “digestive problems” and “other permanent injuries”.
Oh dear – you’ve gotta laugh, haven’t you? If THIS reporter got GROPED by Donald Duck – he’d settle for a pair of tickets to “Tron: Legacy”.