Gary Glitter: given he was the first, that makes him the leader of the gang.
Freddie Starr: he ate more than hamsters.
Dave Lee Travis: so that’s how the hair got on his cornflake.
Stuart Hall: we were knocked out when we heard about him.
Max Clifford: no publicity please.
Rolf Harris: now we know what that third leg was about.
Jim Davidson: nick-nick.
Damn, I hope no-one ever reads this…